Make a desicion

I've found a found who made... maybe we can say.. big.. decision. They married in earlier 20th even not 20th yet. Well, the question is, what is married? I'm sure everyone has their own answer. Buat gue, menikah pasti lebih dari pacaran. Saat menikah, mereka gak hanya sah secara hukum, tapi juga sah di depan pastor/pendeta/penghulu, atau pemimpin agama, yang berarti sah di mata Tuhan. gak hanya itu, walaupun yang menikah adalah 2 orang, tapi menyatukan 2 keluarga enath keluarga besar/kecil. banyak tanggung jawab, baik sebagai suami, atau sebagai seorang istri. Dan, menikah adalah sehidup semati. Itu sih menurut kepercayaan masing2 ya....Yah, gue sih mengikuti aturan kepercayaan gue. Kalau bsen pacaran mungkin masih bisa ganti pacar, walaupun bkn itu jalan terbaik menurut gue, masih ada cara utk mengatasi kebosanan kalau memang niat. Lah kalau bosen sama istri/suami, masa iya mau ganti2? Pernikahan adalah janji, komitmen... banyak orang yang berkeputusan menikah muda. Ada beberapa yang membuat gue kaget, karena secepat itukah? Tapi itu keputusan mereka juga. Apakah mereka siap menghadapi masalah2 keluarga? Siap untuk bertanggung jawab dengan masalah2 keluarga? Siap utk menjadi ibu/ayah? Siap mendidik, dsb? Well, itu hanya mereka yang tahu dan menjalaninya. Gue hanya memperhatikan dan akhirnya belajar dari mereka juga.

PS: Ini dua post-an gue kok kayak galau yah? haha.. mana gue barusan dapet sms dia. Katanya mau ngelakuin hal2 aneh lgi dan tdk minta gue ikut campur.. hadeeeeehhh -.-"

A perfect guy for me

okay.. woho..i'm not patient to write this one. Recently, I've just found what i want in my life.. Hm.. little bit late actually, I should already find what i want in 20th. well, this is specially for having relationship. From one of my friend's experience, and other sources, I know that I want a guy, who love me. of course, it's no need to said. But not just love me, but the important things are accept my condition, as physically, mentally, and the other parts of mine. He has to make me feel better when i'm not in a good mood. You know, a few days ago, I felt lost of.. I don't know, friend, or someone I love with. I don't know what I felt for sure. But, after i knew his mental condition,... hmm... maybe better if we just friend. I need someone who could lead me to the better person for God, myself, and other people.
Have a relationship for me, means process to know each other, and make better for each other too. We covered our partner's weakness. If I'm not in good mood, he can make me at least smile, give me good advice if i have problem and always support me for good things. he can remind me if I do something wrong. and oh ya, not overprotective please.. maybe too many words I want to say... Everybody want prefect in their life, so do I. I want a perfect one, a perfect guy. Although I know it's impossible, because no one perfect. That's why i said we covered our partner's weakness on each other

When I know "that" feeling? They usual called Love. I don't know. When I can get my prince? I never know. Like my friend said, God preparing my prince for me. There's always somebody to everyone

I'm waiting...

untitle

yesterday, they were fighting again...

maybe one of them was blaming on you,

but maybe you're too tired she always blame on you

she said, it was your fault

but you didn't feel that was your fault

you wanna run

to the place where you can go alone

just with yourself

do whatever you want

where no one can blame on you anymore

you want stay away from them

close your ears with both of your hand

or keep your ears open

but ignore what they said

they didn't know what they said

they didn't know what you feel

they just said but they don't want to know what your feel

or pretending to don't know

you have dreams

dreams that make you happy

dreams that at least make you ignore you psst

but, unfortunately you don't know your future

so you can't if the dreams can be true or just dreams

My Kid (2)

Yesterday, i went to Wisnu's home. That's a first time I visited he and his family.at their home. I also brought, emmm.. let's say.. Christmas gift for him, his lil sister, and his cousin who also one of Sunday School children. For Wisnu, I bought Ben 10's pencil case.. He really love Ben 10. For Ciput, I brought her a sandals, which it's my sweet seventeen gift. I wear it only 1 time. And for Vita (Wisnu's cousin), I brought her a jeans. My mom said I never wear that jeans, and its size too small for me now. I spent my time with them, except with Vita, because she lived separated with Wisnu and Ciput. We watched two Christmas Films. I knew Ciput can speak now. YEY!!!! Although, still lisp and sometimes unclear, but she can speak! Wow, I'm very happy. While, we watch film, there's a sick dog on the movie, (and the dog didn't sick, but pregnant) she said "atit..atit" at the same time she pointed to the tv screen. And I answered "Nggak, udah sem..." "buh..."she said.. While she said 'buh" sounds very funny. :)). Maybe during 5 minutes, she just said "atit" and "buh" after I said "Nggak, udah sem...". I really happy while Wisnu yelling because he very happy with my pencil case I gave to. And while their mom said to Ciput, "K Inez mana?" Ciput pointed to me. O ya, when Ciput wanted to talked to me, and I talking with her mom, she hit my thigh at the same time, she said "MAMAMAMAMAMMAMA". Did she think I'm her mother, or want to say "KAKAK" but she can't? She had already can speak, "mama", "papa", but my mom said sometimes, she called her dad as "mama" and her mom "papa"

Oh, I'm really love yesterday afternoon :))

My Life in Ruins

A few days ago, I watched My Life in Ruins. The story about a woman tour guide who know everything about the object history. But, while she explain history, nobody's (tour's members) want to hear history. They did their activity. Pray, when they visited the old church, take a photo, saw the object, etc. Not only that, her tour's member's made her mad. A grandma who thief, an angrier old man, etc ( actually I didn't watch the whole story, just 1 last hour). One day, the angrier old man, said, that was a worse tour he ever joined during 20 years, because.... And the tour guide, who lost her patient, said, "Of course she did, maybe now she enjoy in somewhere.. " he went without his wife. And then she realized.. "I'm so sorry" she apologized the grandpa. From that incident, she being closer with the old man. The old man said, Georgia (the tour guide) too tensed, he told his experienced when he was young, he got a very2 interesting job, he was a ice cream taster, how he loved his wife even though they got angry each other everyday. And Georgia said " I want to be like you", the old man told her she had to open , enjoy her life, a lot of having sex.. Okay, the last word, different culture I guess :D. The point is open and enjoy your life.

It's same with seminar which I joined one week ago. I Love Me is its title. The point is openness. BUT every secret we open, there's a risk. Usually, the sentence " Please, don't tell anybody..." has a bigger risk to open to the other. We have to open. How can we adapted with our environment if we're introvert? But, we have to realized about the risk. A good personality, is we can accept our power and our weakness. Yesterday, I realized that my bad past is a part of my life. I have to accept that. Slowly... :)

And, yeah, life is learning process. We learn from the other people, and maybe people learn from us.

Food without Beverage

When I didn't want to eat, but I have to eat, or I'll be sick, I think these food :

Twilight

I know all of you already know what's Twilight. The Cullen, Vampire, Werewolf are difficult to forget, right? And I don't want to tell you about its story, but my story had correlation with Twilight, I guess.

It was begin when my dad planned to sent me to abroad, for continue my study, post-graduate- master, and he expect I can work there too. He had reasons for that. That's impossible, if I go to somewhere, where there's not my country without speak English, so i have to increase my English. However its way. And it happen while my mom's friend give me her daughter novels (her daughter study in Sing with scholarship). And she offered me if i want to being her daughter's novels owner. So I said yes and between on that books, I (and my mom) found a few (2 or 3) English novels. So, my mom push me to read that novels, even tough I very very lazy maybe even to touched it. Slowly, I started to read it. One by one, with dictionary of course. After I finished all of novel, that didn't over yet. My mom keep push me to read an English novels, not Indonesian anymore. While i want to buy novels which it's same series which novels I read before, my mom said "Don't choose it! It's a Children books" at same time she pointed the signpost "CHILDREN BOOKS". I sighed. My mom want me to read a teenage novels (or maybe 18+ novels? :)) ). Okay. How I could read if its language so difficult for me? I didn't want to open dictionary again (actually,.. lazy :D). And through conversation with Sandra, I supposed Twilight novel more easy than Harry Potter. Its language I mean. Differences English, US with UK. You know.

When I started to read Twilight, I still needed dictionary, sometimes I opened it, sometimes I guess its meaning. And I helpful with chatting with some friends from abroad and helpful with TV's series like Bones or Criminal Minds. NCIS too.

And, now, I am. Reading Breaking Dawn, which is that's 4th books of Twilight Saga. I didn't buy the pocket book for this book, it already sold out. There's just a big book (very big for me). So I bought it, and I read it. Its language not too difficult I guess, not like what I thought before ( I thought its language more difficult than the pocket book because that's big :P). So far, I understand its story.

About my dad's plan. I pretty excited about it. That's why I try to increase my English. Now, I pretty enjoy about learn English, except if I feel tired. lol. Because I need more concern to read English than when I read Indonesian and still difficult to tell you what I'm talking about (that's why I need 2-3 days to post this story, find exact word in English)
I need to increase my English. More and more. Until I reach what I want. This story is only one way to increase my English, and I need to learn English in formal structure because that's what I need first to continue my study..... in abroad :)

NB: I know if I read Indonesian books without 'touch' English books, my English will be bad again (and it happen). That's why I keep to read English novels :D